Dear Juneau class of 2017,
My heart cries for you, for the pain you are feeling today, for the shock that has set in, and the anger and the grief that will come.
Lean on each other during this time. Let all your little common area and hallway groups mold together and reach out to your classmates. You all need each other and this will be easier to get through together.
Boys, don’t be afraid to cry. There is nothing more powerful than allowing yourself to feel the pain, it doesn’t make you less of a man, it makes you a real person who cares about their friend. Let the girls come to you in grief, but don’t take advantage of how vulnerable they are.
Girls, this isn’t a time to fight over who he liked more, or any of that crap. Be there for each other, support each other. Tell your male friends that you are there for them, that it’s okay to cry.
Don’t be afraid to reach out to his parents, they may need some time, but there will be a time they will want you around, they will want to hear your stories and they will find comfort knowing how very loved their son was, and what a good friend he was.
Your teachers are there for you, and they are grieving too. It’s okay to tell your teacher that you’re struggling in grief and need some more help or time or motivation, but don’t be idle. You’re life won’t stop, but for a time it will feel like it. You may feel guilt for carrying on. Please don’t. You have to keep going, you have dreams to catch and dragons to slay, and they won’t wait.
Understand your parents are going to be extra lovey, and extra worried. Don’t fight it, they need this, and even if it doesn’t feel like it, you do too.
Most of all, remember the way you grieve is your own and it’s okay to grieve that way, as long as you keep healthy habits.
I will be praying for all of you, as well as the whole community of Juneau.
Ami Demmert
JDHS class of 2008 (and someone who lost too many classmates)